Revealed: The
Tragic Infant Trauma That Turned Leo DiCaprio into an Eco Loon
by James Delingpole 19 Feb 2016
Finally the mystery of Leonardo
DiCaprio’s bizarre infatuation with the wilder reaches of environmental lunacy has been revealed. 1. His
head was completely messed up by a freaky Hieronymus Bosch painting his parents
hung above his crib when he was a baby. 2. He is quite exceptionally stupid —
more stupid than even his most ardent detractors can hitherto possibly have
imagined.
Here are some of the key take home points about Leonardo
DiCaprio which have emerged from a fawning and no-doubt world-exclusive
interview with Rolling
Stone.
1. Leo thinks global warming is real because…
famous, apocalyptic 16th century painting.
Leonardo Wilhelm DiCaprio’s parents hung a painting above
his crib in the grotty 1970s East Hollywood neighborhood of Los Angeles when he
was a baby. The painting wasn’t an action shot of Peter Rabbit or Curious
George. No, it was a reproduction of Dutch painter Hieronymus Bosch’s
three-paneled “Garden of Earthly Delights,” a dystopian visual description of
Eden being found and lost. It is one of DiCaprio’s earliest memories.
“You literally see Adam and Eve being given paradise,”
says DiCaprio, his blue eyes peering above sunglasses in a Miami Beach
restaurant that has somehow worked “SoHo” into its name. Underneath the table
he fidgets his feet in and out of canvas loafers. He drifts away for a moment.
DiCaprio just finished shooting an interview for a -climate-change film he’s making. (Original working title: Are
We Fucked?) He’s already been to India flood plains and the Antarctica
polar cap, and now he’s not far from Miami playgrounds where he once reputedly
left a nightclub with every woman from his VIP section. All, according to
DiCaprio, could be washed away.
He snaps back to the painting. “Then you see in the
middle this overpopulation and excess, people enjoying the fruits of what this
environment’s given us,” he says. He laughs a sad laugh punctuated by the
DiCaprio smile that can be mistaken for a sneer. “Then the last panel is just
charred, black skies with a burnt-down apocalypse.” He stops for a second
before shrugging. “That was my favorite painting.”
2. Leo knows more than almost anyone about climate
change. So says a completely neutral, unbiased and entirely reliable
environmental activist and movie star.
“There are very few civilians who have the same
understanding that this guy has of climate change. Leo’s a wonk,” says Mark
Ruffalo, who has just combined forces with DiCaprio on the Solutions Project, a
group of scientists and stars hoping to move America toward full-renewable-energy
use. “He’s putting his ass on the line.”
3. If you’re going to use clever foreign words,
Leo, at least take the trouble of discovering what they mean.
There’s a word in German that they don’t have in the
English language that’s called schadenfreude. It means humiliation for
somebody else.”
Almost, Leo. It means taking pleasure in
the humiliation of someone else.
4. Because Leo is famous, people suck up to him for
knowing what is actually pretty basic, entry-level stuff that loads of normal
schoolkids know.
DiCaprio had grown up with a melancholy for extinct
creatures – he once impressed Dr. Kirk Johnson, the director of the National Museum
of Natural History, with his knowledge of the long-gone great auk, a
bird hunted to extinction in the 1800s.
5. Leo is only clever relative to the guy they sent to
interview him.
“I remember the thing that I got the most sad about when
I was little was the loss of species that have been as a result of mankind’s
intrusion on nature,” says DiCaprio, whose Los Angeles home features a massive
fossil collection. He then mentions three species, only one of which I’d ever
heard of: “Like the quagga or the Tasmanian tiger or the dodo bird.”
6. Leo’s environmental bloviating is a direct
consequence of his sexual incontinence.
Like Warren Beatty, Robert Redford and
Paul Newman before him, DiCaprio longed to be seen as something more than just
a panty-dropper.
7. More crap a Yoda could not have chosen he.
A friend set up a meeting with Gore. The vice president
sketched out the planet and the atmosphere on a chalkboard and told the actor,
“You want to be involved in environmental issues? This is the most important
thing facing all of humanity and the future.”
8. The world’s oceans are now so awash with
campaigning celebrities it is literally impossible to have a scuba
accident without a Hollywood actor swimming to your rescue.
A couple of years ago, DiCaprio met with a casual friend,
the actor Fisher
Stevens, once known as Michelle Pfeiffer’s ex and the ethnically
dubious star of Short Circuit 2, but now an accomplished documentary
producer. The two had become reacquainted while filming the disappearing reefs
in the Galapagos, an event made memorable for DiCaprio’s scuba tank
malfunctioning while shooting footage and DiCaprio desperately looking for
someone to help him to the top. He (of course) found Ed Norton, who shared air with
DiCaprio as they slowly ascended to avoid the bends.
9. Even after all the
embarrassment, DiCaprio STILL hasn’t worked out what a Chinook is.
The links grew stronger as DiCaprio visited the hellish
Alberta, Canada, tar-sand oil fields, several hours north of the breathless
mountains and streams of the Revenant set. Meanwhile, filming was
repeatedly hampered by a lack of snow as Alberta “enjoyed” the warmest winter
on record. The connections left Iñárritu and DiCaprio shaking their heads as
they suffered through multiple delays.
10. Unlike his waterside-property-owning mentor Al Gore, poor Leo actually believes all that
rising sea levels shit…
Then they begin to talk. DiCaprio asks Levine if he’s
worried about declining real-estate prices.
“I’m not going to preside over Miami Beach becoming
Venice,” says Levine. “I think property levels are just going to continue to
rise.”
DiCaprio doesn’t agree, saying he’d already unloaded his
beach house: “I wouldn’t take that bet.”
11. Whatever Leo’s smoking, you really don’t want it.
Too black. Too strong.
The conversation turns to places like Bangladesh that
don’t have the money to deal with the rising waters. “The story of climate
change is gonna be places with the most military power to protect their own
resources,” says DiCaprio, hitting the vape pipe. “The billions of people that
haven’t contributed to this problem are gonna be the first to suffer.”
12. Amid the stupidity Leo has occasional glimmers of
personal insight.
“I had a friend say, ‘Well, if you’re really this
passionate about environmentalism, quit acting,'” he says. “But you soon
realize that one hand shakes the other, and being an artist gives you a
platform.” He pauses and offers his palms upward. “Not that necessarily people
will take anything that I say seriously [….]”
13. Leo understands that to save the city you’ve got
to destroy it.
DiCaprio says goodbye to the crew and says he’ll see them
in Paris for the climate-change conference. He knows that one of the first
things conservatives will throw at him is the amount of fuel used by the
thousands of attendees.
“There’s no way we’re not all hypocrites,” says DiCaprio.
“We’ve built this. Our entire society is oil-based. Everything that you see is
because of fossil fuels. The day there is a sustainable way to travel, I’ll be
first in line.”
For DiCaprio, the trip was worth it. After the Paris
Agreement was signed, he declared, “[This] gives us a shot at saving the
planet. There is no time to waste. This marks the end of the fossil-fuel era.”
14. Monomaniacal bore? Lui?
On the way downtown, I mention that his intensity on
global warming is, well, intense.
“You noticed that, huh?” he says.
Leonardo DiCaprio
Leonardo DiCaprio
is a trustee at the Natural Resources
Defense Council, and was a board member for Global Green USA.
Note: Natural
Resources Defense Council is a member of the U.S. Climate Action Partnership.
Open
Society Foundations was a funder for the Natural Resources Defense Council, and the Carnegie Endowment
for International Peace (think tank).
George
Soros is the founder & chairman for the Open Society Foundations, a friend of Michael Douglas, and was the chairman for the Foundation to
Promote Open Society.
Foundation
to Promote Open Society was a funder for the Natural Resources Defense Council, the Sundance Institute, the Carnegie Endowment for International
Peace (think tank), the Climate
Reality Project, and the People for
the American Way.
Robert Redford is
a trustee at the Natural Resources
Defense Council, the founder & president for the Sundance Institute, and an honorary board member for Green Cross International.
Green Cross International
Robert Redford
is an honorary board member for Green Cross International.
Global Green USA
is a US affiliate of Green Cross
International.
Mikhail Gorbachev
is the founder of Green Cross
International, an advisory board member for the Global Security Institute, was the general secretary for the Communist Party of the Soviet Union,
and the president of the Union of Soviet
Socialist Republics (USSR).
David A. Hamburg
is an advisory board member for the Global
Security Institute, and an adviser for the Nuclear Threat Initiative (think tank).
Michael Douglas
is a director at the Nuclear Threat
Initiative (think tank), and a friend of George Soros.
Carnegie
Endowment for International Peace (think
tank) was a funder for the Nuclear
Threat Initiative (think tank).
Jessica Tuchman Mathews is a director at the Nuclear Threat Initiative (think tank),
was the president of the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace (think
tank), a director at the American Friends of Bilderberg (think
tank), and a 2008 Bilderberg conference participant (think tank).
Ed Griffin’s interview with Norman Dodd in 1982
(The investigation into the Carnegie Endowment for
International Peace uncovered the plans for population control by involving the
United States
in war)
Ted
Turner is a co-chairman for the Nuclear
Threat Initiative (think tank),the founder of the Turner Broadcasting System Inc., and an honorary board member for Green Cross International.
Green Cross International
Ted Turner is an honorary board member for Green Cross International.
Patricia E.
Mitchell is an honorary board member for Green Cross International.
Patricia E.
Mitchell is an
honorary board member for Green
Cross International, a board member for Global Green USA, the vice chair for the Sundance Institute, an executive in charge of original productions
for the Turner Broadcasting System Inc.,
and was the president & CEO for the Public
Broadcasting Service (PBS).
Paula
Kerger is the president & CEO for the Public Broadcasting Service (PBS), and a board member at the National Museum of Natural History.
Global Green USA
is a US affiliate of Green Cross
International.
Leonardo DiCaprio
was a board member for Global Green USA,
and is a trustee at the Natural
Resources Defense Council.
Natural
Resources Defense Council is a member of the U.S. Climate Action Partnership.
James Gustave
Speth is an honorary trustee at the Natural
Resources Defense Council, and a director at the Climate Reality Project.
Carol M. Browner
was a director at the Climate Reality
Project, the energy czar for the Barack
Obama administration, and an administrator for the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency.
Albert A. Gore Jr.
is the chairman of the Climate Reality
Project, and was a donor for The
Climate Project.
The Climate
Project was a merged organization with the Climate Reality Project.
Norman
Lear was a donor for The Climate
Project, is married to Lyn Davis
Lear, and a director at the People
for the American Way.
Lyn Davis Lear
is married to Norman Lear, and a
trustee at the Sundance Institute.
Alec
Baldwin is a director at the People
for the American Way, and an actor in The
Marrying Man.
Fisher Stevens
is an actor in The Marrying Man.
Margery Tabankin
is a director at the People for the
American Way, and the treasurer for the Barbra Streisand Foundation.
Barbra
Streisand Foundation was a funder for the Natural Resources Defense Council.
Natural
Resources Defense Council is a member of the U.S. Climate Action Partnership.
Leonardo DiCaprio
is a trustee at the Natural Resources
Defense Council, and was a board member for Global Green USA.
Global Green USA
is a US affiliate of Green Cross
International.
Edward Norton is
a board member for Global Green USA,
and a member of the President's
Committee on the Arts and the Humanities.
Sheila C. Johnson
was a member of the President's
Committee on the Arts and the Humanities, and is a trustee at the Sundance Institute.
Robert Redford is
the founder & president for the Sundance
Institute, an honorary board member for Green Cross International, and a trustee at the Natural Resources Defense Council.
Natural
Resources Defense Council is a member of the U.S. Climate Action Partnership.
Leonardo DiCaprio
is a trustee at the Natural Resources
Defense Council, and was a board member for Global Green USA.
Global Green USA
is a US affiliate of Green Cross
International.
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